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Modern Etiquette: What Rules Still Exist? Tell us your thoughts to win a $75 Amazon gift card

Modern Etiquette: What Rules Still Exist? Tell us your thoughts to win a $75 Amazon gift card

"Dear Abby" was one of the original syndicated advice columns, appearing in over 1,200 newspapers and read by over 95 million people. Times have certainly changed since "Dear Abby" launched in 1956, but we are curious: are there still rules for common etiquette? And if so, what are they?

In the past few weeks, 5 burning questions have come up within the SheSpeaks Team. After much discussion, here are our best answers. Do you agree? Tell us what you think and you'll be entered to win a $75 Amazon gift card!

Are there any questions you'd love the answers to? Submit them and we'll include some of our favorites as future polls on our website!

Q 1. If you bring a dish to a get-together, is it appropriate to bring home the leftovers?

Not usually. Leftovers should be left for the host to enjoy. However, if there are a ton of leftovers and the host is truly insisting you take it, then take it. It's certainly not worth fighting over.

2. Is it rude to leave your cell phone on the table when dining with friends?

Yes, it's rude, but sometimes it has to be done. For example, if you are out without your kids, then it's ok to keep the phone out in case there is any issue at home. But don't take any calls or texts unless they are truly important. It's not fun to be at dinner with someone who cares more about their device than you.

3. If a single person is going in on a present with a couple who is married or dating, does the single person pay 50% and the couple pay 50% or does each individual person pay one-third?

If everyone knows the recipient equally, than everyone pays equally. But if the partner in the couple doesn't know the recipient and is really just a guest, then 50-50 might be ok. Make sure to talk about it with each other before assuming the amount.

4. How do you get out of an annoying group text conversation without insulting everyone in it?

No one wants to hear constant phone beeping when they're not interested in the chat. If there's a chance that the discussion will end soon, then just silence your phone and ignore it. But if it looks like this chain might be permanent, then it's ok to beg out. Best to send a light-hearted text, something like, "Hey all, love this group but need to get away from the phone and actually pay attention to my children! Can you remove me from the chat? Thx!"

5. Are thank you notes necessary? Do they always have to be hand-written?

Everyone appreciates a thank-you but there are varying degrees of how it needs to be said. If your friend buys you a drink for your bithday, sending a thank-you text afterwards is perfect. But if you receive more meaningful gifts, like at your wedding, graduation party or baby shower, than, yes, we still believe that hand-written notes are ideal. Email is ok for informal events if it is truly personalized. If someone spent time picking out a thoughtful (or expensive) gift for your new baby, they deserve something more than a group email saying, "Thanks for coming to my shower! Loved your gift!" 

What do you think? What questions do you have? Enter for the chance to win a $75 Amazon gift card!

#SheSpeaksEtiquette Giveaway

*One lucky contestant will be chosen at random to receive a $75 Amazon gift card. Giveaway is open through July 28th, 2019 to U.S. residents at least 18 years of age. Entrants must be a member of SheSpeaks. If you are not a member, click here to join. Winner will be notified by email.

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  • Hywelda9 By Hywelda9
    07.10.19  

    A dear friend of mine from Chattanooga, Tennessee, used to say that all good manners were meant to be kind and thoughtful of others, and that is truly what should be the impetus behind our actions, not some hard-and-fast rules that may be outdated - life does move on!

  • delectable79 By delectable79
    07.10.19  

    I agree with the answers to these questions. Especially regarding cell phones at the dinner table.

  • Tizzle By Tizzle
    07.10.19  

    100% no technology at the table!

  • Tabetha By Tabetha
    07.10.19  

    Yes I believe all of these are correct

  • paminny By paminny
    07.10.19  

    Agree with them all. The only other exception I make to the cellphone on table rule is if you didn't bring a bag and have nothing to put your phone in.

  • broadwaygirl11 By broadwaygirl11
    07.10.19  

    A lot of the time it depends on the situation. I always leave the leftovers, but take my dish. Unless the host is insistent that I take it all. No phones on the table, but I will put it in my pocket and keep the buzzer on. Thank you notes all the way. And a group text I will leave if I?m not part of the rest of the discussion.

  • Luvzflowers By Luvzflowers
    07.10.19  

    Really good tips!

  • coffeequeen By coffeequeen
    07.10.19  

    I agree with all of these. I still send written thank you notes but have also been low to text a thank you too.

  • Mamanetters By Mamanetters
    07.10.19  

    All of great answers but it is possible to remove yourself from a group chat by yourself!

  • LoraineyE By LoraineyE
    07.10.19  

    With group texts unfortunately I don't think there is anything you can do!

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