SHESPEAKS Your Power to Influence

Of the following compliments, which would you want to hear the most?

As women, different things motivate us. A group of friends recently got together and starting comparing notes on compliments. One had recently been told that she was beautiful. She said that it made her day. Another said that she would prefer to hear that she is special.

Perhaps, different comments are appropriate at different times but, it got us thinking about what we most liked to hear. There doesn't seem to be a one size fits all.

What do you like to hear and why?

I love you (40.4%)

You're beautiful (23.8%)

You're smart (16.5%)

You're special (12.7%)

You're funny (6.5%)

Of the following compliments, which would you want to hear the most?
  • ktj1999 By ktj1999
    on Nov 08, 2007  

    I guess I'm insecure, so hearing that someone thinks I look good means a lot to me. While more important, I love you is so much more than words... you make someone feel that you love them. It's not neccessarily something that you need to say to know if you are loved.

  • jessicamac By jessicamac
    on Nov 08, 2007  

    Its so hard to choose. I enjoy hearing that I'm special. Of course, there's nothing like "I love you"! I think that if most women were truthful, they'd say that hearing that they are beautiful is the most important thing. Its the reason we all spend so much on beauty products!

  • pinkheathermm By pinkheathermm
    on Nov 08, 2007  

    I like to be showed that someone loves me. I really love to hear someone say "You look beautiful" or even just see the look on his face that tells you he can't breathe.

  • Phillychic By Phillychic
    on Nov 08, 2007  

    It was hard to choose because who doesn't want to hear someone say "I love you", but I think hearing "Your special" makes me feel more unique.

  • BoRain By BoRain
    on Nov 09, 2007  

    I've been through a lot of emotional/psychological/physical abuse in my lifetime, and I've always felt as if everyone around me thought I was a complete idiot, so being told that I'm "smart" would do wonders for my self-esteem.

  • caligirl By caligirl
    on Nov 09, 2007  

    Laughing makes everyone feel good. Having a funnybone is definitely a plus for me!

  • bucaboom By bucaboom
    on Nov 09, 2007  

    i know all of the other apply and that is not being cocky just confident which took me a long time to obtain. to be loved is something that should not be taken litely. If you are truly loved you are truly all the rest to the person who loves you.

    bucaboom

  • didama By didama
    on Nov 09, 2007  

    bucaboom's comment really hit home with me. It does take a while in life to truly love yourself and then others will too. Once you are loved, the other things all apply!

  • MaddysMommy By MaddysMommy
    on Nov 09, 2007  

    This was a toughy, I couldn't decide between "You're funny" or "You're smart"...I ended up choosing "smart". I love you is extremely important, but people say it so often that unless it's from family or close friend, it just doesn't mean the same. But when someone says "You're smart", I can't help but blush and it's a good feeling.

  • vanessabucca By vanessabucca
    on Nov 10, 2007  

    Well, I know I am loved and I love very deeply. But what I like to hear most is I am smart. I work hard at obtaining information and being a resource to folks. So every time I hear someone tell me I an intelligent. I feel good. Not about myself, but it makes me feel pretty good on the the inside. Almost as if some is saying "Job well done."