"Dear Abby" was one of the original syndicated advice columns, appearing in over 1,200 newspapers and read by over 95 million people. Times have certainly changed since "Dear Abby" launched in 1956, but we are curious: are there still rules for common etiquette? And if so, what are they?
In the past few weeks, 5 burning questions have come up within the SheSpeaks Team. After much discussion, here are our best answers. Do you agree? Tell us what you think and you'll be entered to win a $75 Amazon gift card!
Are there any questions you'd love the answers to? Submit them and we'll include some of our favorites as future polls on our website!
Not usually. Leftovers should be left for the host to enjoy. However, if there are a ton of leftovers and the host is truly insisting you take it, then take it. It's certainly not worth fighting over.
Yes, it's rude, but sometimes it has to be done. For example, if you are out without your kids, then it's ok to keep the phone out in case there is any issue at home. But don't take any calls or texts unless they are truly important. It's not fun to be at dinner with someone who cares more about their device than you.
If everyone knows the recipient equally, than everyone pays equally. But if the partner in the couple doesn't know the recipient and is really just a guest, then 50-50 might be ok. Make sure to talk about it with each other before assuming the amount.
No one wants to hear constant phone beeping when they're not interested in the chat. If there's a chance that the discussion will end soon, then just silence your phone and ignore it. But if it looks like this chain might be permanent, then it's ok to beg out. Best to send a light-hearted text, something like, "Hey all, love this group but need to get away from the phone and actually pay attention to my children! Can you remove me from the chat? Thx!"
Everyone appreciates a thank-you but there are varying degrees of how it needs to be said. If your friend buys you a drink for your bithday, sending a thank-you text afterwards is perfect. But if you receive more meaningful gifts, like at your wedding, graduation party or baby shower, than, yes, we still believe that hand-written notes are ideal. Email is ok for informal events if it is truly personalized. If someone spent time picking out a thoughtful (or expensive) gift for your new baby, they deserve something more than a group email saying, "Thanks for coming to my shower! Loved your gift!"
*One lucky contestant will be chosen at random to receive a $75 Amazon gift card. Giveaway is open through July 28th, 2019 to U.S. residents at least 18 years of age. Entrants must be a member of SheSpeaks. If you are not a member, click here to join. Winner will be notified by email.
Update: Thanks to all who entered! Congrats to our winner, SheSpeaks member beaniebaby70.
1. Yes- I don't think it is rude to take it with you but ask first. Usually people will throw it out anyway. 2. Only leave it on the table if you think there may be an emergency. 3. 50/50 4. Ignore it. 5. I agree with your response.
I agree with no cell phones at dinner and yes thank you notes are a must.
Yes, I agree with these answers. It seems like the concept of etiquette is getting lost.
Etiquette needs to make a comeback. The cities are so full of rude people, even among so-called professionals.
I think that if you bring a dish to a get together it is appropriate to take left overs depending on the people who surround you. If they are people you know pretty well or friends and while everyone is sort of cleaning up/getting ready to leave, it is okay to maybe make an announcement or speak where everyone(for the most part) can hear you and just mention if it is okay if u take a plate or two home with you...Maybe even compliment the food after that or thank the party host for having you over...that way you don't seem greedy or selfish, instead you seem polite and respectable saying either of those two options.
I am probably more old fashion than most, so I also agree with these etiquette rules. I try not have my phone out at all. If you have the ringer on, you can here it from your pocket/ purse. I actually enjoy sending out thank you cards and I think most people love receiving them.
I think thank you notes are a must! I do NOT agree that cell phones should stay on the table. Let's be more mindful of the people at the table- nothing urgent is likely to happen in those 30 minutes!
I agree with all of the Team's answers. Common sense still goes a long way!
Talking through how much each pays is important. Referring to number 3. I've run into that. Bringing it up first is for a best experience.
Yes, I agree with these. Group chats...I just ignore if not interested and silence them. I try to keep my phone put away when out to dinner with friends. I have one friend who constantly checks her phone while we are out which is not polite. She was even doing this in a movie theater one time and I had to ask her to put it away!
I totally agree with all these answers and definitely found the tips helpful!
I think hand written thank you notes make a big impact with the giver!
I agree with most of these but I feel very passionately about Q1. In fact it's gotten quite some arguments from family. I think it's tacky and a big no no to try and take leftovers of a plate you brought to a party but some family doesn't think so.
These are some great advice! Especially the thank you notes. I usually send thank you cards or email/texts but admit that I've also forgotten to send some too!
It always feels nice to get a real thank you note!